Something I’ve been pondering lately … What am I passionate about? It’s been just there, nagging at the back of my mind for a couple months now. I even wrote it across the top of a blank sheet of paper in one of my notebooks. That’s as far as I got though, the page is still blank. Over the last several months, or even the past few years, I have been a scattered person. I’m one that likes to have a finger in every pie … there are so many good things going on that I don’t want to miss out on any of them! I know there are some that can relate.
But you know what happens when you try and live that that … you stretch yourself too thin. Or as Bilbo said in the Fellowship of the Ring movie, “Like butter stretched across too much bread.” (Hopefully I didn’t butcher the quote too bad).
I think it’s time for me to make some decisions. What direction do I think the Lord is leading me, based on what stirs my heart and challenges my mind? What are those “good things” that I should lay aside to make room for what is “better” in God’s eyes?
Case in point: Last night, I started thinking about blogging. I enjoy it … a lot. It’s helped me keep up with my journaling when I don’t have time to pick up a pen (or when I do, a little 2 year old thinks that it is an invitation to color on whatever blank paper is in her presence.) It’s brought me into contact with some wonderful women who I am privileged to count as friends and comrades for Christ. But how much time should I allot for it. For example, I spend 3 hours one afternoon last week trying to do something to the template on my journal. I got up after that, unable to accomplish what I was trying to do and fix, totally frustrated, and then even more frustrated because I realized I had just wasted 3 hours, DH was coming home soon, and the house needed major picking up and dinner started.
It’s got me thinking if I should step back from it … am I writing for me and my family, or for the commenters? Is what I say of any good or use to others or meaningless babble that I should just keep to myself? If it is profitable - for me to get a chance to write and/or of good to others, how can I set limits on what I do with it?
Anyway, this is one small area that has made this whole issue of “passion” jump to the forefront of my mind. More rambling on this will come in days ahead I’m sure…