Monday's Outlook

Dana had a great post this morning on Mondays. In general, that's how I always feel ... I love Mondays. It's my day to get organized, do laundry, plan for our week, and on and on. But this morning, I am waking up about as grey inside as the weather is outside. I'm so tired. I know this is the phase of life that I'm in, and I hate even getting down about it, but I have been for the last week or so. I'm exhausted. My sleep is interrupted at night still, and, the days where I do try to nap with the girls, I have the hardest time getting them to go down at the same time (... or truthfully, one 2 year old fights going down enough that she doesn't fall asleep until right with the little one wakes up). I miss getting up before everyone and having a few minutes to clear my head and get the right head and heart focus for my day. But it's just not happening.

We leave again this week on Thursday to take some of our youth group to Biloxi, MS for some hurricane relief efforts. N1 will be going to Grandma's and N2 will be going with us. I don't expect that I will be doing lots of relief work since I have the baby ... more like the designated photographer, Gatorate-getter, and chauffer. I'm a little stressed taking the baby when I don't really know what the sleeping arrangements will be like, and my milk has been acting funny lately. I worry about her being fussy and keeping folks up at night (or waking them up). Hopefully the youth girls I'll be sleeping by will be so tired they won't hear her! :-)

Anyway, I'm just under the pile. I'm ready to start working on losing this baby weight, but as soon as I start thinking about calories, counting points, or any of that stuff, my milk starts to dry up. I went out for the first time on Saturday night with a few friends without taking either girlie with me and that was a nice treat ... but instead of being thankful for that, I'm wanting time alone. Not alone with friends, but real alone. Just me, a cup of coffee and a bookstore ... something like that. To tell you the truth, alone at home just isn't the same when I can still see the work on my desk that needs doing, or know about the laundry or cleaning that awaits me when I get up.

Okay, all done. I'm going to go get a cup of coffee, read a few blogs, and when N1 is done watching Sesame Street, we are going to clean up the family room and stuff like that, with a little play time mixed in there. :-) It's a carless day today so we get to be home all day. I have black beans cooking in the crockpot (yum!), fresh homegrown squash given to us from a church family to cook today, and some real, snail-mail letters to write this afternoon. It is gonna be a good day! God is good ALL THE TIME. :-)